Tag Archive for: spiritual health

By Sharon Brock, MS, MEd 

Finding Purpose in Midlife and Beyond

More and more people today identify as spiritual but not religious. In this blog, we explore and appreciate what spirituality is as human beings to increase our capacity for more spiritual experiences in our lives.

“Spirituality is an individual experience,” says Bruce Feldstein, MD, BCC, Head of Stanford Lifestyle Medicine’s Gratitude & Purpose pillar. “As a chaplain and professor providing and teaching spiritual care for the past 25 years, I’ve often encountered people who identify as spiritual but not religious. I’m always amazed by the wide variety of ways people experience and express their spirituality.”

What Do We Mean by Spirituality?

Dr. Feldstein draws from these descriptions of spirituality with his patients and students:

  • “Spirituality is the way you find meaning, hope, comfort and inner peace in your life.  Many people find spirituality through religion. Some find it through music, art, or a connection with nature.  Others find it in their values and principles.” – American Academy of Family Physicians
  • “Spirituality is the aspect of humanity that refers to the way individuals seek and express meaning and purpose and the way they experience their connectedness to the moment, to self, to others, to nature, and to the significant or sacred.” – Journal of Palliative Medicine
  • Spirituality is a core dimension of our humanity. “We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.” – Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Discover What Spirituality Means for You

As a professor, Dr. Feldstein previously taught a course for Stanford medical students entitled “Spirituality and Meaning in Medicine.” With the intention of allowing students to discover and appreciate spirituality in their lives (both personally and professionally as medical students), he led them through this exercise:

First, he shared the descriptions of spirituality listed above and then invited them to explore what spirituality means for them from their personal experience.

Then, he said to the class: “Recall a time in your life you would call spiritual or deeply meaningful, whatever that means for you.” After this reflection, Dr. Feldstein gave the students these journal prompts:

  • What was the situation? Were you alone or with others?
  • What thoughts or emotions occurred during this time?
  • What about this memory caused you to recognize it as spiritual or deeply meaningful?

“Every student had a story, and every story was unique,” says Dr. Feldstein. “Some were moments of awe or deep peace; others were stories of the kindness of strangers where they didn’t feel alone; others were ‘a-ha’ moments of guidance and realization. These spiritual experiences were all moments of spontaneous happening–it wasn’t on the calendar. Often, they took place outside of their everyday routines.”

Dr. Feldstein observed that this reflection exercise increased all the student’s capacity to recognize and cultivate spirituality in their lives.

“We all have this capacity for spiritual experiences, but many of us don’t recognize it,” says Dr. Feldstein. “Most of us are living in black and white, but recognition of these experiences can move us into technicolor.”

Activities that Can Allow for Spiritual Experience

Although we can’t control, predict, or anticipate these spiritual experiences, we can put ourselves in situations and states of mind that make them more likely.

In his class, Dr. Feldstein asked his students to share the situations or activities where they had spiritual or deeply meaningful experiences.

Here are some examples of what the students shared:

  • Life-cycle moments, including births, deaths, weddings, or graduation days.
  • While listening to music that brought a deep feeling of peace.
  • While volunteering for a cause that was meaningful to them.
  • While taking a walk in nature and pausing to admire the beauty of the trees.
  • While offering or receiving kindness and compassion while in conversation.
  • While connecting with others in book groups or reading meaningful books on their own.
  • While singing, dancing, and/or praying.
  • While visiting a loved one at the hospital.
  • While cooking with friends and mindfully eating the food.
  • While taking a yoga class and connecting to their breath.
  • During a morning meditation when focusing on gratitude.

In pursuit of well-being, Dr. Feldstein invites us to choose a few daily activities that are spiritual and meaningful for us. This will help us to be more attuned to spiritual experiences when they spontaneously occur. And when they do, he invites us to pause and acknowledge them, savor them, and feel gratitude afterward.

“As human beings, we have the capacity for spiritual experiences because we are spiritual by nature,” says Dr. Feldstein. “Being spiritual is not something we need to ‘do’, it’s what we already are, so we just need to allow for it.”

By Carly Smith, BS, MPH(c) 

This blog is part of our Gratitude & Reflection newsletter. If you like this content, sign up to receive our monthly newsletter!

Spiritual practices do not have to take place in a church; therefore, every person lives with spirituality in some way. Individuals connect to their spirits and create meaning through various activities, including religious rituals, but also through music, art, or exercise. 

“Spirituality, broadly, is the way that we find purpose, connection, belonging, and dignity as human beings,” says Bruce Feldstein, MD, BCC, Stanford Lifestyle Medicine Head of Gratitude and Reflection. “People find it in various ways–it’s not important where you find it; what’s important is just to get started looking for it.” 

Dr. Feldstein is a board-certified chaplain at Stanford, where he directs Jewish Chaplaincy Services serving Stanford Medicine and an Adjunct Clinical Professor in the School of Medicine. He sees spirituality as the critical element missing from most lessons on healthy aging from elementary to medical school. His experiences as an Emergency Medicine Physician turned Clinical Chaplain inspired him to create the Spiritual Fitness ToolKit, which helps individuals cultivate well-being by exploring rituals for meaning, purpose, and connection.

 “A spiritual practice is as essential to cultivating well-being as physical fitness or nutrition. However, our ‘spiritual fitness’ is typically not discussed as concretely as these other aspects of health,” says Dr. Feldstein. 

Four Questions a Day Exercise

The Spiritual Fitness ToolKit opens with a reflection exercise titled “Four Questions a Day.” To develop habits of gratitude and reflection, Dr. Feldstein recommends spending ten minutes of quiet time at the end of the day to contemplate these four questions, one at a time. 

     The Four Questions:

1. What surprised me today?

2. What touched me today?

3. What inspired me today?

4. For what am I grateful?

Start by asking yourself the first question, What surprised me today? Reflect backward on your day until you come to the first thing that surprised you. Make a note of it in a little journal or on a file on your smartphone. It’s important to write it down. Then do the same with the other questions, one at a time. (This exercise is drawn from research on gratitude and from the teachings of Rachel Naomi Remen MD, originator of the Healer’s Art course.)

After a few weeks of practice, you may begin thinking about these questions throughout your day. Eventually, you may find yourself noticing moments of surprise, being touched, inspiration, and gratitude as they occur. This heightened awareness can allow you to see and respond to  situations in your life with “new eyes,” and bring elements of emotional well-being into your everyday experience.

“The Four Questions exercise could be essential in two ways for people getting started,” says Dr. Feldstein. “It can help develop a capacity for increased emotional awareness and encourage people to become reflective practitioners in action.”

Dr. Feldstein suggests committing to this practice for at least three weeks to develop a new habit, and for 90 days to create a new lifestyle. He also suggests engaging in the daily writing activity with a friend to promote connection and enjoyment.

Sharing Moments of Gratitude

An extension of the Four Questions practice is Sharing Moments of Gratitude, another valuable practice  in the Spiritual Fitness Toolkit .

Feeling gratitude within oneself is one part of the experience. When we feel grateful for something wonderful in our lives, we can share our appreciation of others by saying or doing something for someone else. Doing so expands the experience of gratitude to those around us.

Sharing gratitude can be done in many ways. Most simply, we can say, “I really appreciate what you just did. Thank you so much.” This is most powerful and the positive experience is mutual and immediate. We may also send a thank you note, or offer a small gift. 

One of Dr. Feldstein’s favorite practices is to produce small moments for gratitude at the end of each conversation, discussion, or meeting.

“I often ask my patients or people I am with ‘What can I wish for you today?’ I listen with openness, take in what they say, then respond genuinely with an open heart. This is a practice for offering a blessing. It is one that produces mutual gratitude,” says Dr. Feldstein. “It is a simple practice you can incorporate into any conversation or interaction and greatly encourages connection, healing, and finding peace.”

So, dear reader, what can the Stanford Lifestyle Medicine team wish for you today?